A Touching Mommy-Son Moment

Tonight, after Max was in bed, Davey came downstairs and told me his "eyes were watery". I asked him why and he said he had been reading When Someone You Love Has Cancer, the book I read to him the night the doctors told us there was nothing else they could do. A little later, he and I were talking about his favorite subject next to MarioKart, "Wicked" (the stage production we went to see in late Jan. during the ice storm). He asked me why Elphaba (the Wicked Witch) went into the trap door. I explained it was so she could be with Fyero. He asked why and I told him sometimes people do thing just so they can be with the person or people they love. He asked me, "Did you ever do anything so you could be with Daddy?" I told him that I got a job in Texas and didn't move to another city (like Seattle, one of my thoughts as a senior at TCU was to be adventurous after graduation and move somewhere entirely new, but I wasn't that brave, David was only part of the reason, the main reason being fear of being away from everything and everyone I knew) so I could be near Daddy. He asked, "So you really loved Daddy, huh?" "Of course!", was my response. "What did Daddy do that made you love him?", Davey asked "Did he take you out to dinner?" (how quickly they learn that food is the way to someone's heart!) I explained David took me out to dinner, to movies, gave me flowers, and made balloon flowers. The balloon flowers got Davey's attention. He told me that Daddy is probably making balloon flowers in heaven.

Can anyone tell me... should heaven be capitalized, like other proper nouns that are places, or not capitalized. I need to have an answer for the genius kindergartener in the next couple days... he really wants to know!

So, we had a nice, touching, and deep for a six year old, conversation about love and companionship and sacrifices made for the ones you love. I may have to tie things in future into the Elphaba- Fyero relationship. Many parallels to real life can be made!

Buffalo Boys at the Louisville Zoo

Here are the boys with Davey's buddy from preschool, Ben, at the beginning of Spring Break. The zoo was pretty empty... it was cold, drizzly and the u of L Cardinals were playing. We loved seeing the animals minus crowds!

The Trip, A Milestone

Well, the boys and I survived the long drive to Kansas City for a week of water slides, family time (with my parents, my brother, sister-in-law and nephew), sightseeing and catching up with a friend from college. It was our first trip (other than the shorter one to St. Louis in November) without David. It was a long drive to do alone (probably would have been better to do sharing the driving, but it went just fine- I did have to promise my friend, Melanie, today that I would not try to spread the peanut butter on the celery for the boys while going 72 miles per hour on the way home, so, instead, they ate spoons full of crunchy PB, healthy, huh?). While in KC, we rode many waterslides at Great Wolf Lodge. I was much more successful that I was in February. I even called my physical therapist on Tuesday to tell him that my hard work had paid off, resulting in little pain from the long drive and the ability to be the adult in our group who rode the slides the most. I was quite a hit with my boys, perhaps my 4 1/2 year old nephew, too!

I decided to check out what was available at Cabelas and a huge furniture store next to GWL. The night before we left, while I was packing the van and the boys were inside, I heard a crash. Like any good mother (which I think I am...), I ran into the family room to ensure the safety of my offspring and THEN noticed the lamp on the floor next to the end table in a hundred pieces. I noticed Max looked guilty (and Davey seemed entirely oblivious to the fact that anything happened), so I questioned Max (the FBI has nothing on me when it comes to interrogation!). Max admitted to having climbed on the end table and knocking the lamp off. He apologized and helped me clean up a little.

We did some sightseeing (Crown Center, Union Station, Moon Marble) and enjoyed a couple days with the Coatses. They have a boy 8 months older than Davey and one almost 4 months older than Max. The boys hit it off from the beginning.

We have seen my brother and his crew 4 times now since last June, at the beach house, in August, at Thanksgiving and now spring break. My boys only have 4 cousins, 3 on David's side and 1 on mine. Chip and Sherri and I have had to make a concerted effort to get the boys all together, usually by meeting somewhere agreed upon by everyone, but it is worth it to see the cousins together. I never saw much of my cousins growing up, the few days some summers, if they were where my grandparents were when we were visiting them from England or Alaska. I want my boys to have lots of opportunities to spend time with their family (both related and chosen).

We are glad to be back at home, in our own beds. I felt motivated enough today to go to the YMCA after church and do most of my program, not the back and abdominal section, since that is verboten per my PT,but the cardio, arms and legs portions. Then I even mowed the front yard, raked the sticks and other remaining debris from the back, but didn't get to mow the back before the rain, thunder and lightning began. The prediction for tomorrow is for snow, so we will see... hope my daffodils and tulips survive. Back to work and school tomorrow! Hope I can feel motivated to get moving for that!

Happy spring and happy Eastertide!

Relaxation

I am so glad for spring break to have arrived! The boys can't wait to see their Googey, DadDad, Uncle Fuzzy, Aunt Sherri and J.T. I am wondering how the drive is going to go. The DVD player is rigged up, the movies, books, coloring and activity books are all packed. Laundry has been done, suitcases packed... we are ready! I just hope I can drag myself out of bed when the alarm goes off!

We had a fun weekend. Sleeping in and being lazy yesterday morning and then bowling with the Hubers. Running errands, getting all the snacks we each chose (veggie chips, cheese and crackers, granola bars, apples, bananas, peanut butter in celery, all our faves). Today, we went to Mass, then to the cemetery, then to the zoo with some friends. There weren't many people there, which could be because it was cold (36 degrees!) or could be because the U of L Cardinals were playing (and losing!) right when we were there. I've always had a hard time being a Cards fan (Rick Pitino seems to have recovered from complete egotistical jerkiness, so maybe I can be a little bit of a fan, now) and I have UNC winning on my bracket, so I'm not too disappointed.

I hope I can keep the boys content and getting along and keep my sciatica from acting up too badly this week. I have a list of stretches to do and two appointments for the week after spring break, so IF I do my PT homework, I should be OK, but I am taking some pain pills, just in case.

Wishing everyone a happy spring and, if you are off this week, enjoy yourself, relax and relish in a week of fewer pressures and deadlines!

The Home Stretch!

Here we are at the beginning of another week. Only 5 more work days until Spring Break!!! This past week was a good one, overall. Here are some of the major happenings-

Max started in the Three's classroom: He is now a Ladybug instead of a Teddy Bear. The Assistant Director called on Friday and then he started in there this past Monday. He has made the transition beautifully and enjoys the bigger kids. He isn't the youngest, but I am pretty sure he is the smallest. In this class, they seem to go to the playground more (yippee!), do more "traditional preschool" things (letter of the week, sight words, etc) and Max has now decided peeing standing up is the only way to go. Hmmm...

Western Kentucky Hilltoppers are in the news: At our house, we were excited to see the Toppers beat Illinois early in the week, but then crushed to such that heartbreaker last night against Gonzaga. Oh, well, as they say, there is always next season. Davey stayed up to watch with me. We were also watching the Siena- Louisville game. I think I must be one of the ONLY people in Louisville who would like to see Rick Pitino taken down a few pegs. He has always struck me as a pompous jerk.

I have been experiencing progress with PT: When I began PT in very early Feb., I was only able to get my leg to 25 degrees off the table. On Wed. and Fri. this week, I got it to 70 degrees, with the prodding and stretching of Brad the Wonder PT. I have less pain, more ability to bend and move and, now, more frequent reminders of what I should NOT do (try to carry all the laundry in one load, not carry the groceries in one bag- use the cart all the way to the van, and just be aware of how I bend and twist). I am still hoping I will be able to do things that we have planned for Spring Break, after all, if I don't, Googey and DadDad might have to fill in.

Today, I went to a movie and shopping after with a couple buddies: Bobbie helped me pick out some new additions to my wardrobe that I never would have considered. It was fun! It has been a long time since shopping with a girlfriend! I went to see "He's Just Not That Into You" with Amy and Bobbie. Good flick! I was reminded by one gal in there what drama there can be with dating, something I have had the luxury of avoiding for the past 15 years. She was insightful and there was a character in the movie who kicks her husband out after discovering his chronic lying and after he admits he has had an affair who also seemed quite wise. You hear her at the end talking about being alone again and how it forces you to start over and reassess things. I have definitely learned a lot about myself and the people in my life over the past 9 months. I have seen who is still there, offering support, after time has passed, who has become closer, some who surprise me, and who has drifted away, some who surprise me there, too. I am not happy about the circumstances under which I have watched these relationships develop and change, but I am thankful for those people who have touched my life and those of my 2 precious boys.

Well, that is our week in a nutshell. I hope we will be able to continue to enjoy mild spring weather like we have been and play in the backyard, eat outside and see a lot of our fantastic neighbors. I am ready for the tulips, daffodils and azaleas to bloom. Spring is such a time of renewal, and we need some of that at our house!

Happy spring to you all!!

EMHE- The Backyard Edition- Part II

I have the boys in bed, soundly sleeping, and I just peeked out the window at the swingset. It was quite a sight to behold on Saturday! There were 7 guys here from shortly after 9 a.m. until about 5:00 p.m. It was like Extreme Makeover Home Edition, like back in the summer.

They worked in the cold, the drizzle and the mud to construct the swingset (photos not jet available). There was some discussion and good-natured ribbing amongst them regarding who was working in the garage constructing portions of the structure (ladders, supports, etc.) and who was out in the rain. We dried the instructions in the oven at least 3 times, not once forgetting they were in there and allowing them to catch on fire. I spoke with 2 of the wives in the mid-morning to early-afternoon and relayed messages (instructions?) to their hubbies. I told them that I did not have a husband to nag, so I was borrowing them, so I could stay in practice. There was a great deal of basketball on on Saturday, so they took an hour to get warm, grab a bite and see some hoops. They did remind me that the "important game" (Big East championship) wasn't on until 9:30. It all came together smoothly and these guys enjoy each other, so it was even fun, perhaps. One guy (Kevin, a neighbor) realized he knew a couple of the other guys (as seems to be the way in Louisville, everyone seems to know someone you know, too- it even happens to me now, and I didn't grow up here and I am not related to more than 2 people here). As an added bonus, the quarter-round trip I stained shortly after Davey was born was installed in the master bedroom. I had never seen so many dust bunnies as there were when they pulled the dressers away from the wall to nail it down! Don't worry, if you haven't moved furniture away from the wall in 8 1/2 years, you have them, too!

I was tired after they left, and I really didn't do anything but entertain, monitor and feed 3 children. I did do a little bit, like sweep out the garage, cut up the cardboard boxes to be recycled and moved the remaining parts of the old swingset to the trash. If I was tired, I imagine the guys were ready to drop!

However, somehow most of us managed to be ready to attend a party/ fundraiser for a local neighborhood swim team. I was (again) the guest of friends who make sure I have an adult social life. It was a horse racing (using rolling stools to be the horses) themed soiree. I had a great time and the boys were sleeping when I arrived home. Most of the guys who were on the construction crew were there with their wives, whom I thanked for loaning them to me for the day. Interestingly, the ladies seemed completely OK with having their hubbies out for the day. My theory: they would have been in front of the t.v. watching basketball, anyway, so this way, they knew the guys were doing something worthwhile. There were lots of people a the party that I knew, some from work, others from church- many were folks that I did not know until they brought a meal (or more) during the past 19 months, whom I now count as friends I can call on if I need something.

I felt like the deacon at church today was speaking of my experience. He was talking about our responsibility to look out for one another; that we are called to minister to the people in our midst who are in need, not only material or financial need, but in need of help, comfort or consolation. The community David and I were lucky enough to find here is so amazing, so inspiring and so incredible. People will have Davey over after school, will advise me in matters that are their specialty (and not mine) and will even anticipate needs I hadn't thought of (for example, offering to help me change the sheets so I don't further injure my back). I know they were sent to us to make it so we could keep going through all we have faced (and continue to face). It is easy to emphatically say, "Are you kidding!?!?" when I am asked if the boys and I are moving away. Why would we leave this? Our roots are right here. I am grateful to be surrounded my so many people who care about us and for us. I have never seen anything like it! If you aren't a spiritual person, I am not sure how you explain all this, but I believe our friends were placed in our lives to help us, even carry us, when we can't do it alone.

"Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe unto him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up."
-Ecclesiastes 4:9-10


When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your friends will be there


A friend is someone who knows your song and sings it to you when you have forgotten it. Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.

Power Tools

A woman and her chainsaw, a powerful combination!! I demolished the swingset in the backyard singlehandedly yesterday... just me and my little chainsaw. Before I get lots of comments on how foolish that was, especially considering the evil herniated disk, let me assure you, I was in no more pain this morning as I was yesterday morning. The trash bin is parked at the curb, overflowing with bits of timber and there is a pile next to it that I just hope the trash men feel generous enough to take away, too, tomorrow morning.

Now, next weekend, CONSTRUCTION of the new swingset can begin. There have been several offers from able-bodied friends and neighbors, so, if you find that you are available next weekend (weather permitting), call or drop by! I have several boxes of lumber and such in the garage, just begging to be transformed into a spectacular arena of fun and frivolity!!

The boys have been busy, thus, I have been busy. Davey went to a friend's house to play after school on Friday. We all met up for ice cream after the fish fry at church/ school. The kindergarten buddies played a lot of Wii, I heard. Max and I enjoyed some quality "Mommy-Max" time. We attended a 6th birthday party Saturday afternoon (after which I became a "lumberjane", with my assistant Max). After that, with a GREAT deal of persuasion, Davey joined us in collecting sticks and other bits of storm debris. I told him that if I had to do it all myself, I might be too worn out to fix dinner, so what did he plan on making? He seemed bewildered, but, in the end helped out.

This morning, we had a hard time waking up and getting moving, due to Daylight Savings time, but we made it to Mass on time and got Max settled in at Sunday School. It happens to meet in Davey's classroom, so all I have to do is show him where Davey's seat is and he is good to go.

My book group is meeting this week. We have read The Shack. It should prompt some good conversation! My friend Ronda is choosing the new book. This afternoon, she and I were supposed to meet for a movie, but the movie limes had changed since I looked at them, so we missed it. Instead, she graciously accompanied me on a couple errands, including going to Barnes and Noble to get a gift card. While we were there, Ronda chose the next book (The Undomesticated Goddess, by Sophie Kinsella, hope I didn't spoil the surprise, fellow Booklubbers!!!). So, instead of seeing a Sophie Kinsella movie, I bought a Sophie Kinsella book.

I hope everyone has something fun planned for this week!!