Sunday, March 29, 2009

Relaxation

I am so glad for spring break to have arrived! The boys can't wait to see their Googey, DadDad, Uncle Fuzzy, Aunt Sherri and J.T. I am wondering how the drive is going to go. The DVD player is rigged up, the movies, books, coloring and activity books are all packed. Laundry has been done, suitcases packed... we are ready! I just hope I can drag myself out of bed when the alarm goes off!

We had a fun weekend. Sleeping in and being lazy yesterday morning and then bowling with the Hubers. Running errands, getting all the snacks we each chose (veggie chips, cheese and crackers, granola bars, apples, bananas, peanut butter in celery, all our faves). Today, we went to Mass, then to the cemetery, then to the zoo with some friends. There weren't many people there, which could be because it was cold (36 degrees!) or could be because the U of L Cardinals were playing (and losing!) right when we were there. I've always had a hard time being a Cards fan (Rick Pitino seems to have recovered from complete egotistical jerkiness, so maybe I can be a little bit of a fan, now) and I have UNC winning on my bracket, so I'm not too disappointed.

I hope I can keep the boys content and getting along and keep my sciatica from acting up too badly this week. I have a list of stretches to do and two appointments for the week after spring break, so IF I do my PT homework, I should be OK, but I am taking some pain pills, just in case.

Wishing everyone a happy spring and, if you are off this week, enjoy yourself, relax and relish in a week of fewer pressures and deadlines!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

The Home Stretch!

Here we are at the beginning of another week. Only 5 more work days until Spring Break!!! This past week was a good one, overall. Here are some of the major happenings-

Max started in the Three's classroom: He is now a Ladybug instead of a Teddy Bear. The Assistant Director called on Friday and then he started in there this past Monday. He has made the transition beautifully and enjoys the bigger kids. He isn't the youngest, but I am pretty sure he is the smallest. In this class, they seem to go to the playground more (yippee!), do more "traditional preschool" things (letter of the week, sight words, etc) and Max has now decided peeing standing up is the only way to go. Hmmm...

Western Kentucky Hilltoppers are in the news: At our house, we were excited to see the Toppers beat Illinois early in the week, but then crushed to such that heartbreaker last night against Gonzaga. Oh, well, as they say, there is always next season. Davey stayed up to watch with me. We were also watching the Siena- Louisville game. I think I must be one of the ONLY people in Louisville who would like to see Rick Pitino taken down a few pegs. He has always struck me as a pompous jerk.

I have been experiencing progress with PT: When I began PT in very early Feb., I was only able to get my leg to 25 degrees off the table. On Wed. and Fri. this week, I got it to 70 degrees, with the prodding and stretching of Brad the Wonder PT. I have less pain, more ability to bend and move and, now, more frequent reminders of what I should NOT do (try to carry all the laundry in one load, not carry the groceries in one bag- use the cart all the way to the van, and just be aware of how I bend and twist). I am still hoping I will be able to do things that we have planned for Spring Break, after all, if I don't, Googey and DadDad might have to fill in.

Today, I went to a movie and shopping after with a couple buddies: Bobbie helped me pick out some new additions to my wardrobe that I never would have considered. It was fun! It has been a long time since shopping with a girlfriend! I went to see "He's Just Not That Into You" with Amy and Bobbie. Good flick! I was reminded by one gal in there what drama there can be with dating, something I have had the luxury of avoiding for the past 15 years. She was insightful and there was a character in the movie who kicks her husband out after discovering his chronic lying and after he admits he has had an affair who also seemed quite wise. You hear her at the end talking about being alone again and how it forces you to start over and reassess things. I have definitely learned a lot about myself and the people in my life over the past 9 months. I have seen who is still there, offering support, after time has passed, who has become closer, some who surprise me, and who has drifted away, some who surprise me there, too. I am not happy about the circumstances under which I have watched these relationships develop and change, but I am thankful for those people who have touched my life and those of my 2 precious boys.

Well, that is our week in a nutshell. I hope we will be able to continue to enjoy mild spring weather like we have been and play in the backyard, eat outside and see a lot of our fantastic neighbors. I am ready for the tulips, daffodils and azaleas to bloom. Spring is such a time of renewal, and we need some of that at our house!

Happy spring to you all!!

Sunday, March 15, 2009

EMHE- The Backyard Edition- Part II

I have the boys in bed, soundly sleeping, and I just peeked out the window at the swingset. It was quite a sight to behold on Saturday! There were 7 guys here from shortly after 9 a.m. until about 5:00 p.m. It was like Extreme Makeover Home Edition, like back in the summer.

They worked in the cold, the drizzle and the mud to construct the swingset (photos not jet available). There was some discussion and good-natured ribbing amongst them regarding who was working in the garage constructing portions of the structure (ladders, supports, etc.) and who was out in the rain. We dried the instructions in the oven at least 3 times, not once forgetting they were in there and allowing them to catch on fire. I spoke with 2 of the wives in the mid-morning to early-afternoon and relayed messages (instructions?) to their hubbies. I told them that I did not have a husband to nag, so I was borrowing them, so I could stay in practice. There was a great deal of basketball on on Saturday, so they took an hour to get warm, grab a bite and see some hoops. They did remind me that the "important game" (Big East championship) wasn't on until 9:30. It all came together smoothly and these guys enjoy each other, so it was even fun, perhaps. One guy (Kevin, a neighbor) realized he knew a couple of the other guys (as seems to be the way in Louisville, everyone seems to know someone you know, too- it even happens to me now, and I didn't grow up here and I am not related to more than 2 people here). As an added bonus, the quarter-round trip I stained shortly after Davey was born was installed in the master bedroom. I had never seen so many dust bunnies as there were when they pulled the dressers away from the wall to nail it down! Don't worry, if you haven't moved furniture away from the wall in 8 1/2 years, you have them, too!

I was tired after they left, and I really didn't do anything but entertain, monitor and feed 3 children. I did do a little bit, like sweep out the garage, cut up the cardboard boxes to be recycled and moved the remaining parts of the old swingset to the trash. If I was tired, I imagine the guys were ready to drop!

However, somehow most of us managed to be ready to attend a party/ fundraiser for a local neighborhood swim team. I was (again) the guest of friends who make sure I have an adult social life. It was a horse racing (using rolling stools to be the horses) themed soiree. I had a great time and the boys were sleeping when I arrived home. Most of the guys who were on the construction crew were there with their wives, whom I thanked for loaning them to me for the day. Interestingly, the ladies seemed completely OK with having their hubbies out for the day. My theory: they would have been in front of the t.v. watching basketball, anyway, so this way, they knew the guys were doing something worthwhile. There were lots of people a the party that I knew, some from work, others from church- many were folks that I did not know until they brought a meal (or more) during the past 19 months, whom I now count as friends I can call on if I need something.

I felt like the deacon at church today was speaking of my experience. He was talking about our responsibility to look out for one another; that we are called to minister to the people in our midst who are in need, not only material or financial need, but in need of help, comfort or consolation. The community David and I were lucky enough to find here is so amazing, so inspiring and so incredible. People will have Davey over after school, will advise me in matters that are their specialty (and not mine) and will even anticipate needs I hadn't thought of (for example, offering to help me change the sheets so I don't further injure my back). I know they were sent to us to make it so we could keep going through all we have faced (and continue to face). It is easy to emphatically say, "Are you kidding!?!?" when I am asked if the boys and I are moving away. Why would we leave this? Our roots are right here. I am grateful to be surrounded my so many people who care about us and for us. I have never seen anything like it! If you aren't a spiritual person, I am not sure how you explain all this, but I believe our friends were placed in our lives to help us, even carry us, when we can't do it alone.

"Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, the one will lift up his fellow: but woe unto him that is alone when he falleth; for he hath not another to help him up."
-Ecclesiastes 4:9-10


When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your friends will be there


A friend is someone who knows your song and sings it to you when you have forgotten it. Those who love you are not fooled by mistakes you have made or dark images you hold about yourself. They remember your beauty when you feel ugly; your wholeness when you are broken; your innocence when you feel guilty; and your purpose when you are confused.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Power Tools

A woman and her chainsaw, a powerful combination!! I demolished the swingset in the backyard singlehandedly yesterday... just me and my little chainsaw. Before I get lots of comments on how foolish that was, especially considering the evil herniated disk, let me assure you, I was in no more pain this morning as I was yesterday morning. The trash bin is parked at the curb, overflowing with bits of timber and there is a pile next to it that I just hope the trash men feel generous enough to take away, too, tomorrow morning.

Now, next weekend, CONSTRUCTION of the new swingset can begin. There have been several offers from able-bodied friends and neighbors, so, if you find that you are available next weekend (weather permitting), call or drop by! I have several boxes of lumber and such in the garage, just begging to be transformed into a spectacular arena of fun and frivolity!!

The boys have been busy, thus, I have been busy. Davey went to a friend's house to play after school on Friday. We all met up for ice cream after the fish fry at church/ school. The kindergarten buddies played a lot of Wii, I heard. Max and I enjoyed some quality "Mommy-Max" time. We attended a 6th birthday party Saturday afternoon (after which I became a "lumberjane", with my assistant Max). After that, with a GREAT deal of persuasion, Davey joined us in collecting sticks and other bits of storm debris. I told him that if I had to do it all myself, I might be too worn out to fix dinner, so what did he plan on making? He seemed bewildered, but, in the end helped out.

This morning, we had a hard time waking up and getting moving, due to Daylight Savings time, but we made it to Mass on time and got Max settled in at Sunday School. It happens to meet in Davey's classroom, so all I have to do is show him where Davey's seat is and he is good to go.

My book group is meeting this week. We have read The Shack. It should prompt some good conversation! My friend Ronda is choosing the new book. This afternoon, she and I were supposed to meet for a movie, but the movie limes had changed since I looked at them, so we missed it. Instead, she graciously accompanied me on a couple errands, including going to Barnes and Noble to get a gift card. While we were there, Ronda chose the next book (The Undomesticated Goddess, by Sophie Kinsella, hope I didn't spoil the surprise, fellow Booklubbers!!!). So, instead of seeing a Sophie Kinsella movie, I bought a Sophie Kinsella book.

I hope everyone has something fun planned for this week!!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Positive Influences

Over the weekend, which was a good one, overall, I have had time (and a catalyst to prompt me) to ponder the influences the people in our lives can have on us. I talked to, either by phone, electronically or in person, to several people in the past few days. Some of these people have known me my whole life, others for 15 years or more, others for only since David got sick. So many of them, in fact, nearly all of them comment on some aspect of how I seem to be doing, whether it is how I am balancing work, single parenthood and my own mental health; how great the boys are (smart, polite, kind, etc.- always good to hear about your offspring!) or just to complement me on my strength (that seems to be a pretty common one. I have learned an important lesson this weekend that has been a few years in coming, but I will get to that later.

I went to a party for the parents of first graders, hosted by the parents who live in one neighborhood nearby. On Friday, I was invited to attend, even though I don't have a first grader, it would be a nice adult night out. So, I called our favorite sitter and inquired if she was available. So, we raced from a birthday party that ended at 6, back home so I could get ready for the party. My friend, Bobbi, came by so I could ensure I was appropriately attired with the correct accessories. (Her comment was, "Girrrrl! You look HOT!" It has been awhile since I have heard those words!). I had a fun time, mostly talking to some of the other moms. Two even offered to come over today and help me change the sheets, since I am struggling with this herniated disk and routine household tasks are on the "only do if you have to" list.

I talked to (or communicated electronically with) several friends from college and the days before moving to Kentucky today. It is good to be able to keep up with friends from different parts of your life!

So, after a weekend that has afforded me lots of contact with a varied group of people, I have decided it is important to surround yourself with people who are positive influences and who add something positive to your life, not people who detract from it, or who do not bring something good to your life. Life is too short to waste too much emotional energy on negative people and negativity. I think I am doing a pretty good job as a mom, a friend, a sister, a daughter, a teacher, in all my roles in life, especially under the present circumstances. I have actually begun believing it after having a lot of people try to convince me of it for the past 6 1/2 months. I know there is always room for improvement, but confidence in yourself is a great first step.

I hope all the folks who read this feel confident in their abilities in their various roles in life, and if you don't, do some soul searching and see where you might be able to better.

Have a fantastic week and be strong!