I watched "Grey's" tonight. I don't know if anyone else follows it, but I have been a loyal viewer since Season 2. I haven't had any issues with watching it so far this season... UNTIL TONIGHT. There was an older couple who had been blissfully married for many, many years. The wife had a brain tumor and was having a risky surgery to try to remove it. She signed a DNR order and when she is slipping away, her husband loses it and wants to try anything they can to save her. It brought back some thoughts, feelings and memories of having to watch David slip away. I am so grateful that the doctors and staff turned the monitors off so we would not have to hear the beeping and that continuous tone when the heart and breathing stop. I was urging the docs on TV to turn those monitors off and not torture that poor man, having to listen to those beeps and hums. I didn't cry, but I was thrown into a flashback from August. It still is hard, yet at times comforting to see David in the pictures on the wall and on the dresser. I know I need to go through the closet and David's dresser, but I can't seem to get to the point that I can do it. I know there is no rush, but as the days turn colder, there is someone who needs these long pants, flannel shirts, sweatshirts and sweaters much more than I do! Anyone locally have a suggestion of a place to donate clothes? Wayside? St. Vincent dePaul? Let me know your suggestions!
Compensation
God, I have known sorrow-
I have stood by helplessly,
as fate like a madly rushing, rising river,
Sullen and ruthless, swept from me everything worth
buying at life's mart;
Baby eyes, slowly clouding with death,
have pleaded for life,
As I stood by anxious and sorrowing,
but oh! how helpless.
Sorrow has squeezed my heart dry of all emotion,
Even the tears are gone from my eyes,
I smile-I smile, but God, I have known sorrow.
You have been kind, dear God, for I have known love-
Not mere white, hot passion, but a love so possessing,
Consuming, that no sacrifice was too great to keep it;
A love that hid me from every hurt,
taking me in its strong, tender arms
Up to a land peopled with fairies,
and carpeted with pale hyacinths.
I willingly bear the the loneliness-the sorrow-
Since I have known love.
-- Ruby Berkeley Goodwin
3 years ago
7 comments:
We really love the new picture! I just hope no one thinks you three got put in jail while we were in St. Louis!
The new picture is wonderful!!
Thinking of you tonight...and saying a prayer.
Love you. Hope you're sleeping well. Cute pic from your trip!
I just love the new picture. How fun! I'm glad your time off went well. I usually follow Grey's too, but I did not see the other night. I'll have to go on-line and check it out. I really do enjoy that show. See you soon. You all always remain in my prayers.
Great picture of the three of you! Take your time getting rid of David's things. It will feel right when the time has come. Donating them to charity is an awesome way to make a negative turn into a positive. Wish I could be there to help. Love you!
What a great support system you have up there. I wish there was more that we could do from down here. Brett talks about Davey all the time and wants to come visit. Please know that you are in our daily thoughts and prayers! ~Sim
Hi friend....just thinking about you! We seriously have to do lunch...... :-)
Amy
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